I don't think this is our month...

Well, I took a pregnancy test today and got what the fertility bloggers call a BFN (Big Fat Negative!). It's not looking like it is going to happen for us this month. We are sad of course, but doing well and trying to stay positive. I've just been trying to keep my mind off of things and stay busy. I just wish I would start my period already so we can start all over! Our doctor thinks that Kenny has a prostate infection which is causing white blood cells to be in his semen, which is not good. At our last appointment he put him on antibiotics, which hopefully will help. Our plan for next month is to pretty much do the same thing (femera, HCG injection, IUI), but with hopefully a better sperm count.

I will praise you in this storm

I recently came across this song by casting crowns and it really spoke to my spirit. It has been difficult for me to remain faithful through this tough journey. But in the end I know that God is in control of our situation, and I will continue to love and praise him for all of the wonderful blessings I have in my life and those yet to come:)

"Praise You In This Storm"

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

Started fertilty drugs Sunday

I took my fertility drugs Sunday. I am taking Femera, which I have read is supposed to have fewer side effects than clomid. The first couple days were a snap, but today I feel the hormones raging! I cry at the drop of a hat, and have had crazy hot flashes! It really isn't so bad, it could be much worse. Hopefully it will be worth it in the end! The good news is that since Femera isn't considered a "fertility drug" it was covered by my insurance...YAY!